Heart-Oriented Discipline

Though April is still a few months off, we are pretty sure the infamous terrible twos have struck our home. Gone are the days of sweet baby laughs and coos, instead it's helloooo temper tantrum. Late Summer, the hub and I realized it was time we come up with a game plan- aka how in the world are we going to handle this fit-throwing toddler of ours.

We did a bit of research and decided to look more into the heart-oriented approach. We knew whatever we decided upon had to be Biblical and include the Word.

So, we read...and read... and read some more.

We decided to use the heart-oriented approch to discipline.
Basically it goes a little something like this...

Let's say MG is having a play date and is not sharing a toy with another child. She decides to snatch it away in a not-so-sweet manner. We could do what is easiest- pop her hand, tell her no or to give it back, spank... whatever. Or, we could instruct and rebuke. Basically, if we just reprimand her for the behavior, she will eventually learn to share {which is what we want}. But we've only addressed her behavior, not the heart issue {in the instance of not sharing, selfishness is the issue}. So, we choose to rebuke and correct the behavior, but also use scripture to convict her heart and show her why it's not acceptable. Then, we model for her on how to handle similar situations in the future {i.e. ask if she can play with the toy, wait for the other child to finish, etc..}.

I want her to learn early to examine her heart and find the root of behaviors and issues, not just try and 'be good'.

If I can touch her heart, then the behavior will take care of itself.

So not easily done though.

Bob and I picked up a book that's' basically a topical concordance for behavior. Say hitting is the issue, then flip to that page and there's a list of related scriptures. It also gave 15 that are great to memorize- which we are currently working on.

On to the heated topic- to spank or not to spank. We do believe in spanking {it's Biblical} but agree it is not best for every situation. We use a combination of 'time out chair' and spanking.

Time out chair with our family motto and scriptures.

Our family discipline motto is : "Obey all the way, right away, and in a happy way."

I can already feel backlash from this post coming our way :) Before you roast me over the fires, please remember that discipline is not a one-size-fits-all method because every child is different so each child should be handled differently. What works for us may not work for you- and vice versa.

We are still adjusting and changing as our sweet one grows and changes. What worked last week isn't working now- life is always changing. We found some core principles we felt fit our family and built our discipline foundation around them. There are moments I think- ugh, this is lengthy and I don't have time to pull out the Word- but then I have to stop and prioritize. It takes oh so much patience and I am constantly praying for God to give me more. The best part is, He always does :)